It is not easy to teach children to be responsible for their actions, it is not because it is even hard for adults to be. Adults are ultimately responsible for children being able to take responsibility for their actions. When a child – or an adult – fails to take responsibility, they will blame what happens on others instead of themselves.
For example, a child who does not want to take responsibility for his actions, if he gets a bad grade in class, will say that it was the fault of a classmate that he would not stop talking, if he stains the mud carpet he will say that it was the dog, and so on with many and very different situations.
It is difficult for young children to understand that everyone commits mistakes and even that mistakes are a good way to learn things. Blaming someone is the easiest way to avoid disapproval and negative consequences of your actions. To stop this from happening, here are some tips for your child to start learning from their actions.
You apologize when necessary
Yes, that’s right. Children need to realize that you are responsible for your actions… it is the best example for them to learn to take responsibility for theirs. For example, if at home one day you feel tired and your child is a little bouncy and without thinking about it you yell at him… without a doubt it is an uncomfortable situation that can make your child feel bad and make you regret not having controlled your nerves. . If this happens or something similar, approach your child and ask for forgiveness.
Tell him that sometimes even adults find it difficult to keep control of their emotions, but that you feel it from the heart. It is a good example of not wanting to pass the buck and also that your child sees firsthand what it is to take responsibility for mistakes and learn from them.
Let your child set the points
It It is necessary for your child to be able to establish a link between what he does and what happens by pointing out examples and in real life. For example, you could say something like: ‘Because you studied hard you got a good grade on your math test’ or perhaps: ‘Because you jumped in the puddle now your shoes are soaked and you’ll have to keep them like this until you get home.’
It is important for children to be able to connect what happens with the consequences of it. The more experiences you make him see, the easier it will be for your child to identify the cause-effect and the easier it will be for him to work through his internal dialogue before and after his own actions.
Put honesty into action
If you want your child to tell you the truth, try to remain calm when you are showing your dissatisfaction about their behavior. Being calm and approachable will make your son feel confident so that in the future he can confess and accept his actions. In case he is afraid of the consequences, he will prefer to lie to tell you because he will not trust your reaction. It is a priority that you tell your child that everyone makes mistakes and what matters to do it differently next time and make it better without consequences, is to realize the mistake and learn from it. > Also, it is important to praise honesty.
We do not mean that you have to be punishing your child left and right, but to be responsible he will have to learn to accept the consequences of his words, actions, and decisions. It is the only way for him to understand the rules and discipline. If you try to save him from everything and try to prevent him from having any natural consequences, just so that he does not suffer , then… he will not know responsibility and it will even be difficult for him to mature at a natural pace. He allows her to understand the natural consequences of his actions.