It is normal that as a father or mother you have in mind that your child is good at school, that way it seems that you can build a better future and be a successful person. It is true that it is a peace of mind when children are doing well in terms of academic level, but if parents put too much pressure on their children’s studies, this can be counterproductive and negatively affect the development of children, as well as their relationship with learning.
If a child feels under pressure, he will have no motivation at all, he will only feel that he is threatened by parents who seem to be happy with his results. Pressured children will be paralyzed by fear and will not learn that being successful has nothing to do with fear or pressure. Also, if they have feelings of anxiety, they are less likely to know what is really going on.
A child who feels pressured by academic results may blame their bad feelings about themselves for not being able to be as smart as their parents want them to be… Something that will undoubtedly cause them more stress and anxiety. If your child is showing signs of stress related to schoolwork, they’ll need you to talk to them about what they’re feeling and help them feel better.
He’ll think he’s not good enough for anything
If you’re adamant about your child’s expectations at school, then your child may feel like they can never meet your expectations because it will always be too little and you’ll want them to keep moving forward. Children will grow up thinking that success is based on perfection and that if they can’t achieve it, then it’s better to give up.
If your child feels this way, he needs to know that you are by his side and that making things better or worse will not determine the type of person he is. He can achieve anything he sets his mind to, and if he doesn’t get it right the first time, mistakes will help him get on the right track.
Bad behavior will appear
When children feel too much pressure to do well or are judged for what they achieve rather than their effort, then they are more likely to do unethical things, such as lying and other things. For example, a threatened child who must pass all subjects and is afraid of his results may feel pressured to cheat on the exam or lie to avoid consequences and parental intransigence.
They may also resort to bad behaviors such as aggression to somehow deal with the stress and anxiety they are experiencing each day. Parents need to be vigilant, and if they show signs of being overly stressed at school, they’ll need you to talk to your child about how they’re feeling emotionally and find solutions to that stress or anxiety.
He needs to feel you by his side
If you want to help your children do well in school, the first thing you need to consider is to stop putting pressure on them right now. You need to foster motivation and success through positive discipline . You can offer this motivation by helping with homework, being an inspiration, and being a good role model. If something is not going well, show him that mistakes can be learned and improved, etc.
If you think that you are really putting too much pressure on your child because of their academic performance, remember that you may be adding stress and insecurity to their life. Instead, talk openly with your children so they know that you will be by their side supporting them and that what really matters is the effort more than the results.