Since we are little we absorb information from the environment and from the experiences that we are living. All of this shapes us as people. Although there is also something very important that marks us as people: our own thoughts that we create thanks to the people we are closest to. Therefore, we are going to talk to you about the four agreements for your children.
These are four agreements that will nourish your mind, your thoughts and your heart from childhood and for life. We are talking about knowledge that will allow your children to have a lifestyle that focuses on their freedom and happiness.
The change of thought
When we are adults, we can be aware of changing our thoughts at any time in life to adapt to the circumstances and thus live better. But, teaching children to do this while taking into account some values necessary for their emotional well-being, it is quite a gift that you give them in life!
It is for all this, that since children are small it is necessary to nourish their minds with positive ideas so that they cultivate positive thinking and that this will help them to live a full life in the future, without emptiness or emotional faults that They can darken your heart.
The four agreements for children
It is necessary to teach children what the four agreements are, but how to do it correctly? The most important step is to teach children that suffering is almost always a choice. The popular saying: “Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional” has a lot to do with it.
It is a way of seeing life that can condition the emotions that accompany that perspective. That is why these four agreements are designed to enjoy life to the fullest through resilience . Showing it to your children will be a great gift for them… you will help them lead a peaceful life. The agreements are the ones we discuss below.
1. Be impeccable with your words
You have to speak with integrity. You just have to say what you really mean and feel, no false words… because each one of them matters. You have to use the power of words with knowledge and always towards truth and love. Because words can destroy or build, hurt or heal. Also, our words will influence our thoughts but also others.
It is important to help children grow in a positive internal dialogue so that they can trust themselves and not feel lost. Speaking to others with respect, empathy and assertiveness is fundamental.
2. Don’t take things personally
What others do is not for you, what they say is not for you either… what they do or say is their reality, not yours. It is not worth suffering for the words or actions of another. It is important that children learn not to take seriously the bad words or bad manners of others, because that is the inner world of the other, not of oneself.
When someone tries to poison you with their words or actions, we are the ones who decide whether to accept it or not. If we do not accept it, we will be immune to its poison and therefore, it will not be able to control our emotions.
It is important for children to be clear about who they are and what the values are in their lives. In this way, they will not be able to feel affected by the words or actions of another person… as the popular saying goes: “What Juan says about Pedro, says more about Juan than about Pedro” .
3. Never make assumptions
Whenever you guess, you will be wrong… Therefore, whenever you have any doubts, you must have the courage to ask the right questions and express your own wishes or interests. You have to communicate with others clearly and avoid misunderstandings. Others do not have a crystal ball to read our minds, if we do not transmit our wishes or doubts, they simply will not know them.
In the same way, there is no need to interpret situations, much less without having all the necessary information. In addition, that in the same situation there are always different perspectives… and they are all valid.
In any case, what matters is to maintain an assertive behavior to transmit to children and that they learn to explain what they want without having to hurt the other. This will help them maintain good communication.
4. Always do your best
You always have to do your best so that you don’t have to repent after not having done things in the best way possible. In this way, unnecessary suffering such as guilt or regret is avoided.
Giving the best of oneself does not mean always doing everything well, there will be times when mistakes will appear but you will have to learn from them and start from the beginning. In this sense, children must be taught to focus on the effort and not so much on the result.
You can’t have control over everything in life, but you can control yourself and your attitude towards life.