Sometimes parents compare their children with others with the desire that they excel and be better in some areas of their lives. This is a common mistake that should be eradicated forever since your child does not need to be compared or be the best. He just needs to be happy and enjoy life by your side. Nothing more than that… and nothing less.
Parents today are drowning in responsibilities, in large part because they need to raise money and pay all the bills on a monthly basis. They also want to save to be able to enjoy a few vacation days a year, and all this without neglecting parenting and many other day-to-day responsibilities.
what your children need
Children do not need so many comforts or whims. They need to spend more time with their parents, with their family. They do not want stressed and tired parents all the time. Parents who spend the day worried… Children want and need parents who are loving, attentive and willing to spend time with them. That they be consistent in the discipline and that they give them emotional security every day.
Your children need to learn to express their emotions, their needs… and do it in a healthy way. But they do not usually have this model at home, since parents, in the vast majority of cases, have become accustomed to not expressing their emotions or their needs to avoid problems. When a child does not feel emotionally secure and stable, he will become a child with insecurities and feel unprotected in his own home.
There are many children who barely have time to play because there is so much to do every day. Everyone at home is stressed and without time, the children have more responsibilities than they should and although this causes them stress, they obey because it is what is expected of them. Those who do not obey are branded as irresponsible, immature and rebellious.
But kids need free time every day, and not just on weekends. They need time to be with their parents and not always with grandparents or babysitters. Because it seems that when mom and dad have free time, they are a nuisance and want to do things without children, “to unwind and unwind.” But where are the children? They are left without freedom and without time to enjoy with family.
On many occasions, children go to extracurricular activities that do not satisfy them but they do so in order not to disappoint their parents… who place expectations on them so that they are the best at something. How can a son tell his parents that he prefers to paint when they have signed him up for sports? Will they stop loving him if he expresses that his interests are different from those imposed on them?
Being happy: the key to a good childhood
Children silence their desires to avoid being reproached, but what they need most in the world is to have a happy childhood. Spending time with their parents, siblings… and laughing together. Let there be time for everything: for responsibilities, for routines, for games, to chat, to enjoy…
Ask your son what he likes most about being with you and what he would change if you could spend more time together. The answers will surprise you. It is important for parents to be aware of this so that children go from having sad eyes to having eyes full of happiness and unconditional love.
As parents, we should all ask ourselves this question: “If the world were to end tomorrow, what would you change or do today?” That is the secret of your happiness, of your existence. Because it is more than likely that you will say: “spend time with the family”, “do not argue so much”, “play with my children”… Everyday things that actually fill our souls. Because children need to be happy, not be the best.